Saturday, November 24, 2012

catch up

Well, I cant say that that lasted long.
First few days out of hospital, always take a while to adjust to. I can manage that. I finally feel now, that I am caught up, with washing and sterilised and meds in the right places and so on. However, its only really been a couple of days, yet the crap I am coughing, looks infected again. I do wish sometimes that my body would just comply with normal rules. Where would the fun in that be though I guess.

I have noticed one thing though, the better I am, for example after a course of meds, the more sociable I become. Usually, I ignore texts, ifnore any messages really and never go out of my way to talk to anyone. However, when feeling better, I will reply and even strike up conversation. Its an odd thing. I guess its releated to how much I can truly be bothered with.

When I am in hospital and feeling really really crap, like after surgery, I cant be bothered with anything. I leave things like glasses and hearing aids off. As I get better, they slowly come back into play, which is understandable. However, I have not bothered with my hearing aids for a number of weeks. Just musing really.

My mind is full of rubbish at the minute. Its playing various scenarios over and over in my head and I have no idea if any of them are valid or even which I would want. Things could slip together, but how much pain could you willinginly cause another. How far into the past can you delve before your in too deep. Amd I even seeing what is front of me, is it real, or just part of a common story. The world is a funny old place, but I truly believe in coincidences and such. This probably dosnt make much sense, but for now, my mind can remain steadily confused and I shall not elaborate  as I am far to easily findable.

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