still going

oh wow a day time post :)

Right now, I have that horrible feeling in my muscles of exhaustion. My brain feels a little groggy, like it wants to sleep some more, but for now, I think its time is had some awake time.

So from that you can gather that I am still breathing! yay.
And its great.
Ok, thats a lie, I think.
Its not great in the sense that its not like average joes breathing, for example walking and talking at the same time is still a problem, but it is great in the fact that it is better than when I had the trach in. I can even get though most of the day before the headaches crash in. And to have all that, with no tube hassel, well its pretty amazing to be honest.

Then obviously the million dollar question comes into play. Does that mean the last surgery worked/helped? Its a difficult one. I find it so hard to judge what is good and what is bad. Like i say my breathing is wonderful, but that is only compared to the crap I was used to when I was 70% blocked. It is better than just before I went for my last big op, but then, when I had the big one before it in August, things were even better to begin with. I was breathing great then, peak flows up in like 350, which is only classed as mildly obstructed.

Before the last big one, they were down to 200 after laser and 120 before. And now? Well, they vary between 200 and 250.  I dont even know if peak flow shows anything. I know that in asthmatic terms, anything below 250 for my height/weight/age would be classed as critical and would earn me a bed in A&E. But I know that my system has adjusted a lot to it.

I also know, that right now, my chest brewing something. Its always disheartening to catch a glimpse of fluorescent goo and knowing your body just produced that. What is more, I only finished a course of antibiotics yesterday. Least it is confined to my chest. And is a million times easier to handle than if I were trach'ed.

So all good news. As for the exhaustion, it seems a little unrelenting at the minute, but then I did push myself a little too much yesterday. Helped mum with the shopping then visited my sister. My niece got a rabbit for her birthday and it is just the cutest thing in the world. Lays in your arms like a baby so you can scratch its tummy.  We bought a lead for it, as their garden is very open, so we were hoping it could go out to play, but not be able to leave the garden. To put it simply, rabbits dont like leads ha.

I didnt even come online last night, instead, went straight to bed when I got home. Now that is odd for me. oh wells, nothing planned for today, thank heavens. And mum is naping on the couch. All is well in the world, until next week of course, when we begin again with the whole chemo round thing. fun fun fun. which is actually another point, which may even help thinking now. Monday, I have clinic with my thoracic surgeon, but Wednesday, I finally have my refferal with the chest dude. By Dude, I mean top consultanty person. So perhaps that may finally move things along, and help to get these annoying chest bugs to settle down and stop jumping about in my poor lungies.